Je le Crois
by Prodigy-Angel
Summary: Roy/Ed. Ed comes back from a mission to find the Colonel missing. What happens when he finds him broken, and what will he do to get the old Colonel back.
1. Missing

This is my first time attempting not only an FMA story but also Yaoi...If it's no good I'm sorry. First few chapters will be short..But you can expect them to get a little longer as we go along. Anyways I hope you like it.

**Chapter 1: Missing**

Edward Elric yawned as he walked into Headquarters early one morning. He had just arrived back in Central from a week long train ride from Xing. Every inch of his body ached and he felt a little queasy from the jolting movement of the train he had just disembarked from. Sleep had been hard and not having his morning shower every day was making him more than a little cranky. He wanted nothing more than to hand in his report, and go home and jump into his own bed.

Combing the mostly empty halls of the familiar building Edward made his way towards Colonel Mustang's office. Though they sometimes fought, Ed knew deep down they probably understood each other far better than most people did. Especially the last little while, the Colonel had been unusually…nice. This change of attitude was somewhat disturbing to the teen, and he had spent the last month trying to make heads or tails of it, and failed to come up with an adequate explanation.

Pushing open the door to the Colonel's office, he was greeted with an empty chair and numerous worried faces. Quickly taking in what was going on he figured he had walked in on an important meeting, one that didn't include Mustang. Instead of turning around and walking out, Edward waltzed right into the middle of the group and demanded to know what was going on.

The answer shocked him and he felt himself pale as it sunk in. The Colonel…was missing. The moment his life turned upside down and topsey turvey, was actually around the time Colonel Mustang had disappeared into thin air.

'It's my fault...' the blonde thought to himself, 'If I wasn't so insecure he wouldn't have tagged along…And he wouldn't have been put in this situation.'

Clenching his fist, he made up his mind. He was joining the team looking for Mustang. He would find the man and get an answer to the questions in his mind, the very same questions that had cost him hours upon hours of sleep. Quietly he spoke up and directed his question to First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye. "I want to help," he stated simply earning him a look of confusion from the Lieutenant.

"Of course you can help Edward, but I thought you had your own agenda?" The blonde haired woman frowned, looking hard at the young alchemist. The boy's request was the last thing she expected to hear from him...He and the Colonel were always bitching about the other, and how much they hated each other. Edward shrugged nonchalantly. "I do have a report to make, and besides...I was last to see him. I can help you figure out exactly what happened."

Edward struggled inwardly with his words, was that really the reason he wanted to help? He thought back to his last few moments with said Colonel and couldn't help the faint red flush that crept across his cheeks at the memory. The Colonel had been oddly nice to him, caring...And it had thrown everything out of whack for Edward. He had to find him, if only to overcome this new desire that threatened to engulf him.

Luckily Hawkeye had already turned away and so did not notice the blush that darkened Edwards's cheeks. She pointed to a couple of blue uniformed men in the distance. "Major Armstrong and Lieutenant Colonel Hughes are leading the investigation, I'm sure they would appreciate any help you could offer them." Without another word she walked away leaving Ed alone. Slowly he made his way over to the aforementioned adults waving carelessly as he approached. He explained to the two shocked men his plans to help and asked for whatever information they had.

It was Hughes who spoke first. "We know he disappeared off of the train as he was returning. Eye witnesses report that there was quite the struggle before an unknown male forced the Colonel off of the vehicle at knifepoint. Though his current whereabouts are unknown we have had sightings of him in Dublith....but" Ed's ears perked up at this, Dublith?? He had to get there and find out for sure. He nodded. "That's where I'll go then, don't worry I'll find him and bring him back." He turned on his heels and walked away, not noticing the frown from the other man. Though there were reports of the Colonel, what didn't seem right was that he was walking alone, no escort...As though he wasn't a prisoner. He had been trying to tell Ed that when he had walked away so quickly.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Edward slumped into the bench of a train for the second time that day. He was exhausted but he couldn't wait till the next morning to start his investigation, every moment he wasted was another moment for the trail to turn cold. He was worried, and he couldn't hide it..Not from himself, or it seemed, from the other passengers. He had received more then a few stares when he had practically thrown himself into the bench tapping his foot impatiently, waiting for the train to move. Maybe it was just the fact that he was a child traveling alone, maybe it was more.

Edward didn't care. Though he did long for some company, he relished the silence that was giving him yet another chance to sort through his thoughts. Not too long ago everything had been crystal clear to him: find the Philosopher's Stone, get Al's body back..That was all. Now there was something else, he hated to admit it to himself...But perhaps there was more to the Colonel then he had ever thought.

For the umpteenth time that day Ed remembered the last time he had seen the Colonel. The boy had been chosen to lead the mission in Xing and the Colonel had come to explain customs to Edward so he didn't offend anyone. Edward had been visibly shaken when told that he had been handpicked for the mission and felt oddly exposed because Al hadn't been allowed to come. Ed knew he had a bad temper and didn't think he could successfully keep things from turning hostile.

When the Colonel had noticed Ed's fear he had said nothing, just wrapped his arms around the younger man and held him, whispering encouraging words. And Ed had been comforted and had slept. Ed closed his eyes, feeling more then a little frustrated. 'Why did he do that!?' he thought heatedly. Maybe the reason he felt so compelled to find his missing superior was that he craved an answer to this question. He felt he deserved a reason for having his black and white world suddenly changed to shades of grey.

The trip to Dublith seemed to take forever but eventually the weary boy reached his destination. Stretching to relieve the aches and stiffness in his body he joined the other passengers and left the train behind. Now that he was here, he was a little lost on where to begin. He hadn't stayed long enough to even hear where in Dublith the Colonel was last seen. Ed kicked himself mentally for being so impatient. Hughes had seemed to be about to say more, he knew, but he had not been able to wait. Sighing he realized that he'd just have to look around himself and hope for a lead. Aimlessly he combed the back ally's of Dublith looking for a sign of some sort. Out of the corner of his eye he noticed something run away from him..Someone actually. Unthinking Edward gave chase, being lead out of the city and to a small clearing in a nearby wood. The figure had disappeared, but there in front of him was a campsite, recently used.

Ed leaned down to inspect it, there were a few different sets of footprints, and the ashes were still faintly glowing. They had just left. From the look of things it had been hurriedly abandoned. Not something a vacationer would do. Ed wondered if it could be the kidnappers. His eyes searched the ground...Wait, something was flashing in one corner pushed into a hollowed out tree stump. He rushed over to find it. Inside was the Colonel's pocket watch. Ed looked at the silver watch, feeling apprehensive. It seemed to be crusted shut with something that could only be blood. Shuddering Ed whiped it off carefully and put it in his pocket. He'd have to hurry and find the kidnappers, who knew what those bastards were doing to Mustang....


	2. First Night

I forgot to mention last time that this concept was taken from a musing/rp me and a friend had going. I may get her to help me with some of the later parts in the story. Yay for collaboration! Did everyone see the first episode of FMA Brotherhood (subs are already up O_o)

Disclaimer: I am sure everyone knows I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist.

**Chapter 2: First Night**

As Ed contemplated the meaning behind the watch the sun had dipped considerably lower in the sky. Ed frowned. If he continued searching in the dark he would most likely miss vital clues. Dejected he made his way back into town and checked into a hotel for the night. The room was small but comfortable and Ed finally took a moment to relax after his stressful few days he'd finally put behind him. Remembering that he hadn't showered since he left Xing the young alchemist made his way into the shower joined to his room. Quickly shedding his clothing and adjusting the temperature he stepped in, allowing the cascade of warm water to carry away the dirt from traveling as well as some of his worries.

Feeling significantly better now that he was once again in order and washed, Ed wrapped a towel around his waist and returned to the room, sitting on the edge of his bed and patting his hair dry. His body felt deliciously warm and he was just beginning to realize how much his muscles ached as well as the tiredness that pulled at every fibre of the teenager. He had wanted to stay up and figure out a plan, but his body, he realized, wouldn't allow that. Yawning, the boy clambered under the covers, quickly falling asleep.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Golden eyes peered up at the ceiling in a sort of tired stupor. Yawning he blinked a few times letting his eyes adjust to the darkness. Why was he awake? Confused he sat up, pushing the now tangled covers aside and freeing himself from their restraint. The flaxen haired adolescent scanned the room, looking for some sort of outward sign that would justify his sudden consciousness. Satisfied nothing was out of place he settled back down onto the pillow. A few minutes later he sat up again. There it was...A smell, so faint he could have been dreaming it, but no....There is was again. It smelt like scorched wood. Ed groped in the darkness for the lamp at his bedside and finally pulled the string, illuminating the room in a harsh yellow glow.

Ed groaned as his eyes adjusted to the light, and rubbed them vigorously in an attempt to lessen the glare. Looking out the window he noticed that one of the branches just outside his window had been badly singed. 'So that's where the smell was coming from.' He thought to himself than gasped. 'Wait! That couldn't be a fire...It was only the one branch.' Once again his eyes scanned the room, coming to rest on a pair of gloves placed on the table carelessly. Ed didn't remember them being there when he had gone to sleep. He grabbed them up and sure enough, it was the Flame Alchemist's gloves. Ed was starting to feel sick now...What were the kidnappers doing...Why were they goading him like this? Something seemed wrong, why was he being lead to their captive? Was it a trap? Swallowing hard to calm his nerves Ed noticed a small piece of white paper sticking out from the inside of one of the gloves. Carefully unfolding it, the Alchemist read a hurriedly scrawled message: 'If you want the Colonel back go back to the clearing tomorrow morning. Come alone. Tell no-one.'

Crumpling up the paper Edward realized it wasn't even an option not to go. His conscience wouldn't let him abandon his commanding officer. After making sure the window and door were both locked the weary young man returned to his warm bed, but it was a long time before he could fall asleep.


	3. Found

Due to people's responses I am uploading early lol. I originally wasn't going to put this one up till about Wednesday. But instead here it is, enjoy ^^

**Chapter 3: Found**

After a few more hours of restless sleep Edward woke up feeling worse off than when he had gone to bed. Groaning he extracted himself from the fortress of now crumpled and tangled blankets and yawned loudly. It took him a minute to remember the strange events that had taken place the night before, but a glance at the gloves on the table jogged his memory and the worry he had been feeling returned ten-fold.

For the second time in the span of a night Ed wondered what the hell those kidnappers were thinking. Did they find it funny to lead the poor boy on some sort of wild goose chase, was it some kind of trap...Or had they just gotten all the information they needed from the older man and was now looking for other ways to amuse themselves? Still contemplating the mystery he slipped on his jacket and trudged downstairs to grab a quick breakfast.

A few minutes later he walked out into the early morning sun and with sure steps retraced his way back to the spot he had left the night before. Nothing much had changed aside for a fresh set of footprints that lead from the direction of the hotel further out into the forest that encircled that part of town. It seemed too intentionally done to ignore and so he followed it down into the deepest part of the woods, his every sense sharpened and looking for danger. After walking for about ten minutes the trail of footsteps ended at a deep flowing river. Ed felt a wave of disappointment wash over him. What if the kidnappers had used the river as a means of transportation, leaving no trail?

Deciding to leave no stone unturned Edward picked his path across the river using a set of stepping stones a little further up the river bank. This side of the river was far rockier and the going was tough. It wasn't long before he had to sit down and rest, his exhausted body refusing to go another step until it had a chance to catch up. Sitting on a tall rock he scanned his surroundings. First time around he didn't notice anything out of the ordinary. On his second scan he noticed something blue and tattered waving from a cave's entrance. Knowing what it was the young man jumped off his perch and retrieved the fabric.

As he had expected it was the colonel's blue military coat. Edward peered into the black abyss of the cave. With a sudden stroke of genius he fished the colonel's gloves out of his pocket and put them on. With a snap the cave's entrance lit up just enough to prove to Edward he wasn't going to kill himself jumping into the black hole. Slowly he made his way down into the dark cave a lit branch held confidently in front of him.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Once inside, Edward realized he was in what appeared to be an abandoned mine shaft. Beams of a dark coloured wood held the ceiling in place, but looked so rotted he couldn't help but feel nervous and quicken his step. The cave seemed to go on forever and was dank and smelt of old water. From somewhere deep inside a constant dripping sound echoed over and over again in the surrounding silence. Aside from that the only sound was Edward's own footsteps, and the lack of noise was making the blonde nervous and jumpy. Long before the circle of sunlight had dwindled to a sliver and now the only light came from the burning branch in his hand, which was shaking ever so slightly at the thought that he could be trapping himself in with anything. Presently in the silence he thought he heard something else, a ragged breath seemed to reverberate against the narrow walls.

Ed broke into a run, his feet slapping against the wet ground and making too much noise to ignore. Ready for anything he ran headlong towards the faintest glow ahead of him….And came out into a wide cavern. It differed from the rest of the mine. The passages were massive and well carved out, almost as though it had been done by some machine and in the wall torches were hung softly casting their light on everything around them, illuminating any potential hiding place or escape. The walls shone brilliantly with hidden minerals and gems, like snow in the moonlight in a way that if Edward had stopped to stare, he could have been hypnotized by it.

Quieter now, Edward crept around the cavern listening closely to the breathing and following it. Quietly he murmured Mustang's name, desperate to know if his search was ending. He jumped in surprise as a voice called thickly back 'Fullmetal? Is that you?" and almost dropped his torch. He hurried to the source of the sound and was shocked to see a beaten and broken Colonel tied up against the wall. His shirt was torn in many places and lash marks were plainly visible through the useless fabric. Roy's face was haggard, and his eyes held pain, though the man was barely conscious. Ed felt hot anger rise in him as he clapped his hands together, breaking down the shackles that kept him captive and allowing Roy to lie down and curl up, probably for the first time in days.

Edward shook in his anger, and looked around trying to find some clue of who could have done this. Granted, Roy had enemies, they all did, but who would go to such great lengths to not only torture him…But to keep him alive. "Taisa, who did this…." He asked in a whisper. He received no reply but a whimper. "Taisa?!" He repeated louder and less controlled. "Who the hell did this to you?!!"

Crouching down beside his commanding officer Edward gently shook him, afraid that the man may have given in and passed out and was astounded as the Colonel latched onto him with surprising strength his entire posture speaking his trepidation and dread. Wildly Mustang scanned the room as though his time confined had made him feral, unhinged..Less than sane.

"P-please!!" he stammered his voice raw either from lack of use or screaming. "Don't let him touch me…He'll come back..He said he'd come back!!" The Colonel's arms dug fiercely into Ed's arm and from this distance he could not only see the multitude of crusted blood on the Colonel's body, but the wild fear running rampant across the usually cool and collected man's features. Realizing that the longer they stayed there the more likely the Colonel's prophecy would come to pass Edward tried to rise with the man he admired but was pulled back down and back into the unyielding grip of the man.

"We have to get you back to the hotel Colonel…He can't hurt you there." Edward said comfortingly, noticing how pale the other had gotten. He knew he had to get him patched up soon or risk the Colonel bleeding to death. "We have to go or he could come back." The teen said frustrated, and winced as Roy's grip on him tightened painfully.

With a jolt Edward realized that Mustang was sobbing and the anger returned, along with fear for the man's sanity. How long would it take to get out of there and after that…How long before Mustang returned to his usual smug self? Fighting for calm himself, Edward reached up and pushed a lock of matted hair from the Colonel's eyes and looked at him kindly. "I won't let him hurt you." Ed said softly, comfortingly, yet meaning every word. With a child-like faith Roy nodded and allowed himself to be lead up and out of the cave, jumping at every shadow thrown by the light of a single torch in the darkness.


	4. Recovery

Hi again, updating as promised. Next one might be a few days, seems I wrote these chapters in a hurry and there was so much more that could be said about em. Also after the next chapter the updates will be coming a little slower because you all will have caught up to what I already have written. I will try and keep myself on a schedule so you can probably expect a chapter a week until it is finished. If I seem to be slacking . Feel free to bug me if it's been over a week between chapters. Thank you to everyone who has been reviewing, they are so appreciated. ^_^ Without further ado the next chapter *bows out*

**Chapter 4: Recovery**

Once back in their hotel room Ed loosened the dirty collar of the Colonel's shirt and gently led him over to the bed. Ed hissed as he noticed the damage to the Colonel's body was worse than previously thought, he was surprised the man had kept his wits about him. Granted, Ed had practically dragged the elder all the way back. Numerous cuts and scrapes as well as the mysterious lash marks marred the Colonel's once immaculate skin, and Ed was certain some at least would leave scars. He helped the Colonel to pull off the ruined remnants of the shirt, despite protests from the other.

Ed went into the bathroom for a facecloth and wash basin, returning to the shivering Colonel with a basin full of warm water. Wetting the cloth he gently whiped away some of the accumulated grime as well as the blood and stale sweat from his superior's face. During the entire time his commanding officer hadn't said a word, just regarded him in an inquisitive, yet frightened manner. Ed once again wondered what he had endured, and who had spirited him away in that manner…And what was to happen now that he was returned. He must have looked very serious, because after he had rang out the cloth to rid it of the mess and brought it up to the man's face once again, the Colonel flinched away as though he'd been slapped. Sighing he tried to soften his expression and reassure Mustang, but he continued to pull away, begging not to be hurt. No matter how many times Ed tried to console him, he couldn't get close to him again and so handed him the bandages and pointed to the bathroom so he could bandage himself as best he could. He'd try again in the morning.

Ed knew he'd get no farther tonight and dropped the cloth back into the basin. Once the Colonel returned looking a little less scared Ed got up and walked to the far side of the room where he had laid out a few blankets and a pillow for himself. Pulling the blanket around himself he smiled softly at the other man and after uttering a soft goodnight fell asleep.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Late that night, just like the previous night, Edward found himself awake and staring at the ceiling suddenly. Listening carefully, he realized what he was hearing was quiet sobs and knew instantly who it was and what was happening. Carefully he got up and made his way over to the bed and to the silhouette of the broken man rocking back and forth in a quiet dance of pain and suffering. Very quietly, so as not to startle him Edward called out to the man, for the first time in his presence daring to use his first name, as though he were an equal. Mustang's head whipped around and stared directly into Ed's eyes and amidst the fear the teen was shocked to find a spark there burning like fire, causing Ed to take a step back in surprise.

Then in a flash Roy reached out and grabbed Ed's hand, gripping onto it as though the whole world revolved around this one act. Like his sanity depended on it. The Colonel gave a tug on the arm, not liking the space still between the night and the only comfort he could grasp. Blushing into the darkness, hoping it couldn't be seen Edward tripped forward and into the arms of his commanding officer. Awkwardly Edward patted Mustang's back and muttered a few comforting words, his mind reeling and rebelling against his regular cynicism. Though in the back of his mind Ed knew that in the morning Mustang would probably return to his stoic self and refuse to admit this event took place, Ed wanted it so badly to be real t felt as though his heart would rip in two. His mind wandered trying not to think about where he was and who it was that was now once again hugging him for dear life.

Uninvited, strange thoughts came into Edwards mind. He liked the feel of strong arms around his back holding him. He thought of how warm the Colonel's body felt next to his, and on the hot breath tickling the hair's on the back of his neck. Ed's own heart skipped a beat when he realized he could feel the Colonel's heartbeat through the thin fabric of his pyjamas. The more he tried to dispel the thoughts the more prominent they became and he wondered about the women Roy dated and what they did, turning quite red at the improper images that flooded his mind. Unable to stay still anymore Edward wrenched himself from Mustang's grasp and ignored the confused look he got while he tried to still the thumping of his traitorous heart.

Turning away still flustered Edward tried to make a quick dash back to his own makeshift bed but his pyjamas seemed to be snagged on something. He pulled twice sharply yet he couldn't seem to free it. Looking down he noticed that he wasn't snagged on a nail or part of the bed as he had thought, but a pale hand had seemed to attach itself to him. Following upwards as expected he saw the imploring eyes of one Colonel Mustang. For the first time since being rescued he didn't look frightened, instead the fire in his eyes had returned and he looked driven. Amidst the persistent stare Edward was receiving he couldn't help but feel shy, another new feeling. The rapid beating of his heart returned when he thought of the possible scenario's the Colonel could be thinking of, could he even be mistaking him for someone else?

"What is it?" Edward asked, trying in vain to add a little bite to his words and mask the longing he was trying to push down. 'Why, why WHY!' Ed's mind screamed, 'Why now, why me…Why am I reacting!' Ed mentally chastised himself. He fidgeted, the images from before still burned to his memory, though he was now seeing himself in place of all those others..Making him nervous, jittery and maybe just a little excited, though he'd never admit the last part.

"I don't want to sleep alone..." the Colonel said uncertainly breaking through Ed's musings, releasing his hold on the fabric he had instinctively entwined around his fingers. "I can't sleep…The memories…It's like I'm there again." Edward sighed softly, he couldn't keep being aloof if the man kept making such obvious requests. He decided to play innocent, pretending he had misheard him. "I'm sorry..Come again? I'm just over there Colonel, not even a stone's throw away. I'll hear if something is up.." He said softly holding his breath, waiting for the other man to reply that solution was acceptable. Instead of replying, childishly he gripped onto his pyjamas again, refusing to let go. Again Edward sighed, there was no way around it…And truthfully, Ed didn't mind the request.

"Just for tonight then.." he said softly, climbing into the bed and allowing himself once more to be enveloped in the embrace of the one man, despite his guards, he was falling in love with.


	5. Slow Mend

Nagi:

n.n;;; I meant to upload this yesterday in honour of Ranger Appreciation Day but by the time I got home from work it was past midnight…And I was exhausted. This is still my gift to you all for that day regardless that it is late.

I am a little hyper right now, it's getting so close to my trip and to the next con where I can go as Edward again, AND I got my violin back after almost a month of it being in the shop v_v *hugs violin* Oh how I missed it so.

Anyways, there's a little more fluff in this one, but for those I know who are wondering why this is rated M…. you'll find out soon. We hear a little more on what Roy endured in this chapter. OH and this one is my longest yet…Over 2, 000 words ^_^ I will keep trying for longer chapters without having it interrupt the flow of the story. Please let me know if I ramble on too much, or if you want more detail etc and I will do my best to accommodate it.

Thank you again for all your kind reviews, they make my day, they really do. And they spur me on to do my best and to quickly get this story out for you all who can't wait to see what happens next. Hugs and smiles to you all… As well as to Ranger Appreciation Day this chapter is dedicated to you all!!!!!!! Especially to my wonderful 'brother' who without her gushing reviews on this story while I was writing the initial chapters, I would never ever have published it. Thank you Aru-chan!!!

**Chapter 5: Slow Mend**

The sun was peeking through the thin white curtains in the borrowed room the next morning, hitting Edward's face and waking the young alchemist. Upon waking, he felt a strange feeling, one he hadn't experienced since he was a child. Ed almost thought he was still dreaming, feeling warm and safe, enveloped in another's embrace. He snuggled into the warm body and for the moment was back to when he was five and his mom would hold him like this, his brother, flesh and bone, beside them. A small smile played across his features, still half in a dream state, he wrapped his own arms around the sleeping figure softly muttering a morning greeting, thinking of when they'd get up and make breakfast, careful not to wake Al, who they'd let sleep in.

Reality came in the form of a soft and rather low pitched groan as the man beside him started waking up, sending Ed's senses and memory into overdrive. His eyes flew open taking in the situation and quickly Ed came up with his solution. Carefully and swiftly he pried himself from the warm body still holding tight to him and swung his legs over the side of the bed. He was back in his own spot before the raven haired man's eyes opened. Bright red he threw himself under the covers to hide the feelings that were getting more difficult to push away.

Roy chuckled, he had felt the bed lift when the younger alchemist had made his mad dash to the safety of his own comforter. Unlike Ed, Mustang hadn't needed any reminder of the night before and was beginning to wonder if Ed's normal caustic behaviour might be an indicator of something more. He then shrugged away the thought as ridiculous. "Morning Ed…" he said, the tone of his voice amused, finding the younger alchemist's antics adorable.

Ed mumbled something in reply, still facing away from him and under the covers, stubbornly refusing to let the other see just how he affected him. After a pause he heard the other get out of bed and head into the shower. The hiss of running water became the prominent sound in the small hotel room and only when Ed was sure Mustang wouldn't be coming out for awhile did he sit up pushing away the covers, lightly hitting his cheeks as though punishing them would bring them back to their regular colour. He paced the room for a moment, his face serious and then left the room.

When Mustang finally emerged from the shower Edward had laid out a spread of food ordered from the kitchen downstairs. "You probably haven't eaten well in awhile, and I didn't know what you wanted to eat so I just ordered a little of everything." He kept the tone of his voice light, remembering the state of the man the night before. Roy smiled, almost a smirk, and bent down giving Ed a quick kiss on the cheek before sitting down, laughing at the shocked expression on the boy's face. "Sit down baka, it was just a thank you kiss on the cheek. Don't tell me you've never even experienced that before?" He tested the boy, watching his every reaction. Ed's eyes remained wide and he was worrying his lower lip, speechless…Unlike his usual self. There certainly was something there, but Mustang wondered if it just that he'd been an orphan so long he'd forgotten what it was like to actually be close to someone.

Ed stammered for a moment before sitting down across from his commanding officer. He concentrated on his hands, which were sitting in his lap and ran through things in his mind…Anything to push away what had transpired. 'He's twice my age..' he chided himself. 'He's a womanizer, he's never shown interest in guys as far as I know. He thinks of me as a son, obviously it was nothing more than as he said.' To distract himself further he spooned some of the eggs and fruit onto his plate, careful to keep his gaze from the other who he could feel watching him, presumably waiting for the dish he was serving himself.

He passed it on and finally looked up. "If you don't mind my asking..What happened to you? Who did it? Do you know?" Even though these questions were less important to him than some in his mind, he figured they were the most relevant. Quietly he took a mouthful of the yellow, fluffy scrambled eggs and chewed thoughtfully, giving Roy not only a chance to serve himself, but to digest the questions thrown at him.

After a long silence in which the only sound was their forks against the china plates Roy cleared his throat and began to speak. "I….I don't know exactly who did it. I can guess it was the Homunculi because his form kept….changing." he shuddered. "Sometimes he'd be a random person, then he'd come back and be someone I knew. If he has a true form I never saw it, I couldn't identify him even if he was right in front of me. He…hurt me…Over and over again." Roy shuddered looking at the wall but seeing himself back there. "He loved to torture me as people in my life I either cared about….Or who I wronged." He remembered when he had been repeatedly burned as the little Ishbalin boy he had been forced to kill and buried his face in his hands, the fear and guilt he'd felt coming back tenfold.

"Sometimes he even came to me in your form Ed.." he admitted willing himself not to sob again. What he didn't tell the boy is what had happened that time. How in that admittedly beloved form he'd told Roy that everyone had wanted him dead, had tortured him…beaten him until he couldn't see straight. It had gone on so long, and had been such a convincing charade that Mustang had believed him and thought himself beyond hope and forsaken, sold out and given to the enemy without remorse. His hands and body started to shake once more and Roy disgustedly thought himself pathetic and weak, helpless in the face of a fate he himself had made.

Small hands wrapped around his shoulders and he felt soft hair and a trickle of warm breath against his neck. He could hear whispered words, encouraging him to tell his story, but also that it was over and not to believe what his captor had threatened him with. Roy stiffened, memories still fresh in his mind and instead of comforting him, the contact bothered him more and made him angry. Caught in his memories he swung around viciously, his fist connecting with flesh, knocking the smaller than average boy clear across the room. With a sickening crash he hit the wall and collapsed onto the floor, stunned and scared. Mustang came back to himself and gasped, feeling awful and slowly walked towards Ed, who pulled himself from the floor and into a guarded stance ready to brace himself for the next hit, just in case Mustang still saw him as someone else.

Seeing him in this state and knowing he caused it, Mustang broke down and flung himself for the third time in as many days against Ed, knocking him down again, hot tears running down his face and into the fabric of the teen's clothing. He pulled the boy into his lap in his desperation and ran his hands over his body, checking for lasting damage. He sighed in relief when he realized there was none. The only thing he could fathom would be that Ed would probably have a small bump on his head in a few hours. He clutched onto the boy's shoulders tightly, frightened Ed would run if he had the chance. "I'm sorry….I didn't realize…" he sobbed into his chest wanting the boy to realize how deeply he regretted his actions. He muttered these words over and over again, and felt the boy relax in his arms, forgiving him this once and Mustang sighed, relief washing over him. He was broken, and alone…and right now, Ed was all he had and he wouldn't lose him over his own battered memories.

Ed just sat there, head throbbing his heart beating fast. He was once again held captive in the man's arms and allowed him to cry, hating how the wet fabric was clinging to him, and feeling awkward and shy. He was also quite scared that any touch of his own might again send the man spiralling down into memories and pain. In turn he knew that could cause him pain. Ed had never realized just how strong Mustang was, and was caught off guard, first by the unprovoked attack and also by the arms tightly wrapped around him, tight enough to restrain him and most likely to bruise his shoulders. He didn't care all that much but still squirmed a little uncomfortably and wondered how he was ever going to heal him, how he was going to be strong for him…and how much he missed the strong personality of the broken man.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

The weeks went by in the sleepy town. It was an ideal place to stay, as there were no one to ask unwanted questions and no officers demanding that Mustang return to work before he was ready. Ed stayed by his side day by day and little by little the episodes where Roy would lash out and attack Ed, or cry against him withered and became a thing of the past. Life in Dublith was quiet and peaceful and gave both a chance for quiet and contemplation, something both had been lacking in their busy lives living in Central. Surprisingly the two rarely fought, and talked often. Ed was careful not to mention anything about the past war or pry too hard for answers, and for his part, Roy stayed away from the touchy subject of the other's height. They were becoming closer and instinctively knew when the other wanted to talk, and when it was best to keep silent.

Nights still posed a problem for the older man, who cringed at the shadows and jumped at every noise. More often than not he would wake Ed, and the younger more reluctant boy would be cajoled and guilted into sleeping next to his commanding officer, a comfort Ed was quickly becoming used to, but still usually fought. The sun was setting one night as Ed was preparing for bed, and for the first time without being asked he slipped in next to Roy and snuggled up to him innocently, only loving how for the moment he could be close to him without worrying about his secret being discovered. Were he to be asked, he would just reply that he knew it helped the older man sleep. Really, what was the harm when it allowed for both to sleep comfortably, and satisfied their need to have someone close. Ed was still convinced Mustang saw him as family, and was trying his hardest not to let any of his own more sordid ideas pass through, content to lay them down as well as his pride in order to stay near the one he loved.

For a long moment neither one talked and Ed felt so warm and cozy that he was nearly asleep, his loose hair framing his face in an almost angelic manner, a smile upon his lips. Mustang gazed down at him, marvelling at how easily the boy was smiling lately, it was something he had so rarely seen before this whole ordeal. The Colonel smiled softly in return at the younger one in his arms, knowing this wouldn't last much longer, couldn't last much longer. He was healing…And the boy would return to his normal guarded, cynical self once they returned home. It was a thought that saddened him. He sighed and loosely ran a hand through some of the golden strands near him. "Ed?' he whispered, wondering if he had already fallen asleep. Eyes the colour of molten gold stared up into his dark ones in reply. "Tomorrow let's go home.." he requested then turned over, overcome with emotion, releasing the other and fell asleep.


	6. Return

-OMG I am SO sorry guys T_T I swear I did not mean for this one to take so long to write and I apologize if it's not as good as my previous chapters. I have been having a TON of computer problems (Most involving a very frustrating blue screen) and I am not out of the water yet…I am so lucky this piece of you know what turned on and I have no clue when it's going to go bye bye again. When it does it is getting sent away, to be fixed. Rest assured, if I HAVE to, I will go to the University to write. I will let you know however, that between computer problems, work and getting ready for a big convention I am going to (LOTS of sewing to do) the updates will be sparse…..And I know I will get hell for it, but I only have like 26 days before I am on a plane and everything has to be finished by then. I am not giving up on this fic…There's only like 2 more chapters (more if people hate the ending) to go…And they'll be better than this I PROMISE!!!!!!!!

**Chapter 6: Return**

There were still patches of mist rising into the air, yet to be burned off by the morning light. The leaves had dewed and showered the two figures that cut their way through the field to the train station, wetting their pants and causing the smaller one to shiver at the cold. Silhouetted in the dusk they made their way to the waiting area, sitting on the bench reserved for waiting travelers. The pair kept their silence, nervous because both knew something was ending. The younger of the two stifled a yawn, covering his mouth with a gloved hand, eyes closing. The result was the cutest sound Mustang thought he had ever heard, akin to the mewling of a kitten. As it was still insanely early, the streets of Dublith were empty. Every so often a freight train would pass through, dropping off some cargo and filling the silence with whistles and creaking joints, jolting the younger one awake each time. Roy laughed softly and told the younger one just to sleep if he was tired, getting up to stretch his own legs, promising to return with breakfast.

Edward balled up his black coat to use as a pillow, the wrapped his read cloak closer around his petite frame. It wasn't the most comfortable place, but he laid down on the bench, not sleeping, but content to stare up at the quickly lightening sky, warmed and comforted by the familiar items. The sky became royal blue as he watched, the clouds tinted purple, red and gold..Then faded away as the sun made its appearance once more for another day. It was the one thing Edward could count on not to change after this day, though filed away this sunrise in the back of his mind, to remember the short time he had been happy. He sighed, and wished he had the courage to actually tell the Onyx eyed man how he felt. Then suddenly he laughed at himself, angry for acting like a love-sick schoolgirl. He had never been one to wait for someone else to do things for him, so why did that change now? More sure of himself now that he realized how stupid he was acting, he vowed to at least drop some hints on the ride home and see where it led him.

Edward was starting to wonder how long the Colonel was going to be gone, and began tapping his finger impatiently against the wood. What if something had happened to delay him? Disturbed, he jumped up from the bench and rushed down the platform to the restaurant. About half way however, he ran into the Colonel, who seemed to be running away from something. Both crashed to the floor and their breakfast, a couple of sweet buns, rolled away half squished onto the dirt floor ruining them. Unphased Ed jumped back up and looked the Colonel over, wondering why he was running like a bat out of hell. His eyes filled with unasked questions as the other struggled to regain his breath. Without a word Roy grabbed the other's hand and rushed onto the waiting train, collapsed into a seat white as a ghost. This worried Ed as he more slowly sat across from the other man.

"Are you alright?" he asked, his tone careful. After a moment Roy nodded. "I thought I saw him on the platform..." he said softly, shaken. "Did he hurt you?" Ed asked alarmed, knowing who 'him' was, but the other shook his head in the negative. "I don't think he saw me, but I was glad to get on the train. I bet he was waiting everyday hoping to catch us. We were lucky." He sighed and Ed agreed, but they were going home now and there was no one to stop them now. He leaned back comfortably in the side, smiling. "Guess we're home free now." He said happily, trying to reassure the Colonel all would be well.

Ed stared out the window as he always did on train rides. Watching the world go by was relaxing to the boy. If you stared long enough and relaxed your gaze the trees, rocks, water and towns all melded together into a big colourful blur with the speed of the vehicle, and he loved to try and piece together what it was he was seeing. He leaned over and lazily opened up the window, and the muted sounds of the wheels and whistle became louder. Ed leaned out the window, taking in the scene and letting his mind wander. He closed his eyes, and his ears filled with the rush of wind, reminding him of the last time he had come to Dublith, with his teacher. The echoes of their childish voices jubilantly yelling out from the train window floated back eerily to him and he slipped into memories. He was leaning out another window just like this one, his stomach knotted in excitement and worry. Beside him, his brother, younger by one year, was equally excited. They were both leaning out too far, their faces awash in the rush of air and the smell of the smoke from the train. Their first trip….Who knew it would be the start of so much more……

He was pulled quite literally from his reverie by two strong arms that were taking him away from the open window. Apparently he'd been leaning too far out because he now looked back and into the worried eyes of his travel companion. "Sorry…" he muttered embarrassed, sitting back down in his seat. His teacher had eventually done the same thing, if he remembered, lecturing the boy's about safety. They always seemed to forget, as he had just now, that branches could jut out suddenly from the forests they passed, and take out an eye...Or even one little boy. He sat closed off, wrapped still in memories, worried about the present. Roy sighed and waved a hand in front of Ed's eyes, and received no response. He clicked his fingers together…Still nothing.

Eventually Ed came back to the present, with an annoyed looking Roy about an inch from his face. Apparently he'd been calling his name for awhile, and Edward blushed at being so spacey...And also because Roy was really really close. From the distance the younger could make out every detail of his face, and he couldn't help but stare. He just caught himself from making a disappointed sound as Roy moved back, though noticed the Colonel still sat as close as he could, leaning forward with his hands clasped in front of him on his knees. "There's been something I have been meaning to ask you.." Roy began, and something in the other's gaze made Ed's heart beat wildly. His mind filled with a million different things, from Roy's asking about a report he hadn't made all the way up to what he most wanted to hear, but didn't dare to think. "Okay…Shoot." Ed replied, hoping he sounded cool and calm, he'd feel like an idiot if it were all shaky and Roy was only going to ask about the leaky sink in one of the many bathrooms at Central Headquarters he expected Ed to fix.

"I've been wondering for awhile, what you actually think of me." The Colonel smirked, watching Ed's face colour, exactly the reaction he had been hoping for. "I--I-…What do you mean?" Ed finished lamely, his mind unable to process the implications of what the other was asking him. The other's eyes seemed to darken as he leaned closer. "I am asking what you think of me, Fullmetal." He replied. "Cause I have been wondering if it's more than simply thinking of me as your commanding officer." Ed's blush deepened and he stammered something unintelligible before suddenly, he felt the lips of the other on his own. Ed gasped in surprise, but couldn't help himself and wrapped his arms around the other he so longed for, and returned the kiss in earnest. A minute, which felt like eternity, passed by and eventually they pulled apart, the younger gasping for air as he had neglected to breath. Roy smiled again, it coming out more as a smirk. "I thought so…" he replied thoughtfully. "You'll be happy to know the feeling's mutual." With that he closed the distance again and claimed the other's lips, relishing the taste of the other he waited so long to have.

Feeling bolder the younger blonde leaned forward and positioned himself so he was sitting in the others lap. It was comfier than expected and his face lit up impishly with the discovery. Roy seemed, on his part, to be flabbergasted by the other's sudden courage and Edward decided to show him just how quickly he could learn and took the lead, kissing him fervently. The two exchanged kisses as the train sped on its way, the world outside indifferent to the discovery happening inside. To the two souls finally releasing pent up emotions and succumbing to their wildest desires. They didn't look up from each other once, as though memorizing every little nuance of their partner until with a jolt the train stopped, signifying their return home.


	7. Prisoner of Love

**Chapter 7: Prisoner of Love**

**Author's note: Sorry sorry sorry!!!! This chapter is so late. First off it was supposed to be a collaboration, but that didn't work out...then l got severe writer's block, and my computer died numerous times, l lost my flash drive etc...so, to make up for all this, this one's a lemon. Hopefully that's a good enough apology. As always critiquing and reviews are very much welcome and help me to write faster -bows-**

They disembarked from the vehicle into the hustle and bustle of the train station in Central. It was everything Ed hated about trains: the constant chatter that made thinking impossible, bratty kids bugging other passengers, the leeches and freaks, jerks and shady characters that always seemed to call trains home. In short, Central Station was riddled with human scum and Edward hated counting himself in the ranks. Of course there were the families and the honest workers trekking to the city for shopping or a job they hated but it seemed nowadays like they were scarcer than the other, less desirable, group. He also hated train robberies and takeovers, and had been in his fair share. Usually he ended up going ballistic and unknowingly saving the other passengers. It was part of the reason he had the reputation of being 'for the people.'

Pushing his hands deep into his pockets he walked beside the taller man. Glancing over at Mustang, the teen noticed he seemed very uncomfortable in the large crowd that kept brushing up against them. He took pity on the elder, knowing exactly what it felt like to hate people invading in your personal space. Ed pushed through the crowd quickly, cutting a path through the sea of bodies, so they could get out of there all the quicker. Finally out in the open air Roy seemed much more at ease and his way of walking turned from a nervous side step to a more confident strolling. Edward looked around himself getting his barring then started walking in the general direction of the military building. He knew Mustang's house was around there and he had the idea of walking the Colonel most of the way home then going to tell the gang the good news, that their wayward superior officer was home safely.

Lost in his thoughts he didn't realize Roy had stopped at the fork in the road that separated the path to his home and Headquarters. When Ed finally realized he turned and smiled. "Don't worry, I'm just going to go tell Hawkeye and the others, I'll see you tomorrow at work." He waved and was shocked as the elder grabbed his arm, shaking his head. "No major, you're coming with me." He said softly, staring the other in the eyes. Edward could feel his face heating up as the Colonel seemed to mentally undress him with his eyes, making him more than a little embarrassed. He shrugged slowly and the other released his hand. "Al is probably worried and so is everyone at Headquarters, Riza especially, and I think they should know that you're okay."

Roy chuckled. "It's not like they know you're in town yet." He said mildly, "Another night wouldn't hurt." He took Ed's hand and began walking down the path to his home and was mildly annoyed when the blonde wrenched it free and glared. "No they _NEED_ to know now. What's gotten into you?" Edward tapped his foot impatiently, he was cold and tired and could use a little R&R before heading back to work. He didn't know what had gotten into Mustang, sure they had just confessed their feelings for one another and found it was mutual, but that didn't mean Roy could now just drag him off to wherever he damned well felt like. He had a feeling he knew what was plaguing the other man, but wasn't sure if he was ready to go that far yet, though he had fantasized about that moment for the last six months.

Mustang bent down and kissed the other again, trying to coax him into doing what he wanted. "I want you, that's what's gotten into me and I think that's more important right now than Riza knowing I'm back. If she knew, I'd just be dragged into work to sign a bunch of basically meaningless documents. I think you are much more what I need." He purred then laughingly picked Ed up and tossed him over his shoulder. The boy started to protest but Roy gave his ass a tight squeeze, earning a squeak from the other who quieted down, presumably embarrassed by the other's forwardness out in the public. "Consider this an order FullMetal, you're to come with me. I want to get to know you…And perhaps have some fun while we're at it." He laughed at the other's weak attempts to get him to let go. It was obvious the other was excited by the idea, if his body were any indication. Roy carried him most of the way to his house than put him down about twenty feet from the door. The boy walked with him the rest of the way, cursing the Colonel for making the decisions for him.

Edward was the last into the house. As he turned to close the door he was suddenly pushed back against it. He felt the Colonel's warm body press up against him and gasped at the thrill it sent through him. Then Roy's lips were upon his, crushing them with enough force to bruise. Ed tried to match the intensity of the other, parting his lips subconsciously as the man's tongue danced over his lips moistly. Ed was so focused on how strange the other man's tongue felt inside his mouth that he wasn't aware of the colonel removing his shirt until it was half way over his head. "Whoa, wait...Wait!!" He said, firmly grasping his shirt to keep it down. Roy pouted at Ed, who promptly turned red and held onto his shirt all the more firmly.

Roy massaged the other's neck to get him to relax a little. "Come on Ed, what'll it matter if you just take off your shirt. It's hot in here anyways." Ed appeared to think about this a moment, torn between his desires, hormones and his nervousness. Slowly Roy gently pried the other's fingers from the black fabric and then pulled it up and over, exposing the boy's chest. It was flawless aside from the scar that ran from his shoulder to the middle of his torso, a remnant of the surgery he had endured to get his automail. Roy ran a hand over his chest, feeling soft skin and scar tissue. He gently pushed against the raised smooth skin, watching Ed's reaction. "I didn't know that automail left such scars, does it hurt when I do this?" He asked pressing down against where the scar met his shoulder, noting that Ed had shivered delightfully at the pressure he exerted on his skin.

"No, it doesn't hurt..." Ed mumbled his mind preoccupied. Mustang continued to caress the other's chest, waiting until Ed's eyes gently closed before undoing his belt. In the same movement he pulled off his pants and gently laid him on the floor. Coming back to his senses, Ed looked up into the eyes of the other, lust and fear both apparent in his eyes. "I don't think I want to do this…" he said nervously. Roy silenced him with a finger on his lips and a soft shushing sound.

"We'll take it slow." He assured the younger one. "Though God knows I want to screw you into the floor and have you screaming my name," he growled, and kissed Ed again possessively. Ed felt his heart leap into his throat and reacted fiercely, kissing the Colonel with equal passion. His heart was beating so fast and hard he was sure the Colonel could hear it through his clothing. Then the Colonel broke away, causing Ed to frown in disappointment. The elder looked at him curiously. "You know, I expected more fight, but you seem pretty willing." He laughed, watching as Ed's face flushed in both excitement and embarrassment. Teasingly the Colonel undid his shirt, enticing the younger one with the sight of his chest, marred though it was now with healing scars. Ed reached up to touch but Roy intercepted his wrist, smirking softly. "No touching yet, just watch." He whispered into the younger one's ears and then seductively removed the swath of fabric from his shoulders.

Drawn to the movement of fabric over skin, Ed followed the shirt's decent to the floor. His eyes were drawn back to movement above him and looked up to see the Colonel popping open the button on his pants. Ed trembled in anticipation, still a little nervous about what surely followed the removal of their clothing, but his body was responding to the erotic display the Colonel was giving him. What was frustrating to the teen was the fact he couldn't give into his curiosity and touch him. He wondered what it would feel like to run his hands over the elder's hard body, seeking reactions to pleasure only he could give.

The Colonel, noticing his gaze and the intensity in the other's eyes suddenly leant over the other, showering him in light, electrifying kisses. Edward gasped from shock and grabbed the Colonel, finally reaching his limits. He seemed to be burning, and engulfed in this passion the teen excitedly explored the older man's body, shyly keeping away from the region between the other's legs.

Suddenly overwhelmed by the unexpected ferocity of the younger man, Roy pushed him back flat against the carpet and straddled him despite the protests Ed began to make. Carefully he positioned himself so his quickly hardening member was placed against the other. Ed gave a small gasp. Roy gazed at him, eyes glazed over in lust. "I'm sorry…I don't think I can hold back any longer." He said apologetically, still looking for permission before he went on.

Edward blushed but nodded, wanting to know what it felt like for Roy to be inside him. When Roy didn't respond to the nod, Ed looked over at him. "I-I want it too…" He said uncertainly, torn between the fear of the unknown and the excitement of the new and novel. Roy smirked.

"I didn't hear you? You spoke so quietly..." He replied teasing the boy by rubbing himself against Ed, but not penetrating. The teen moaned softly and glared, lifting himself up in a way that spoke volumes, but the Colonel still didn't give him what he so desperately wanted. "I think you need to speak up to be heard Edward." He purred softly, earning a more prominent glare which was quickly withered as the Colonel gently stroked the other's now hard member.

His breathing ragged, Ed did his very best to stay mad at the Colonel but it was hard with what the elder was doing to him. Instead he decided he'd better give up some pride and admit what he wanted. "I want you…" He started, getting too embarrassed to finish.

Roy chuckled lowly teasing the boy further by removing his hand and any hope of pleasure. "You want me to what?" He asked, gazing intently at the prone body beneath him. Ed groaned in frustration, but Roy just shrugged. "I really don't know what you want unless you tell me plainly," he said softly, knowing full well what Edward needed by this point.

Ed closed his eyes, and thought he was probably running a fever, his cheeks were so hot. He was utterly embarrassed that the Colonel would make him beg, knowing full well what he wanted. He needed _something _to happen by this point, and Gods alive he wanted it. He wanted Roy. He sucked in a deep breath, steeling his courage and opened his mouth to speak. At first he couldn't find the words to convey exactly what he wanted, but staring not only at Roy's intent gaze but downward Ed suddenly found himself bursting with want. "God damnit Roy I want you to take me…" he said, his tone strained. "You know exactly what I want you bastard so just give it to me." He admonished but his rant was cut short as Roy slowly pushed a finger into him.

Startled Ed tensed up at the peculiar sensation, gripping onto the carpet below him. The Colonel expertly moved his finger around in him. Feeling Ed tense around him he kissed the apprehensive teen. "You need to relax Ed, or it'll hurt." He told him softly, wanting this to be pleasurable for both himself and his petite lover. He angled his finger, seeking out a certain place within the other's body and knew he had succeeded as Ed let out a breathless moan. Carefully he inserted a second finger, stretching him gently as he continued to put pressure on the gland. Squirming, unsure of what to do with himself, he pushed up towards Roy. "This is your first isn't it?" Roy said with a small amount of smugness. Ed could only nod in affirmation and gasped, between pain and pleasure as Mustang made a scissoring motion, stretching the teen further.

Roy figured that he had prepared the other sufficiently and after removing his fingers he lowered himself onto the younger man, penetrating the deepest and most intimate part of his lover. Ed was a bit uncomfortable as Roy filled him from the outside in, pulling muscles that had never encountered this kind of treatment further apart, stretching them past what the teen had thought possible. After the initial discomfort of having something large pushed into a place where most people only have things come out, Ed found it pleasurable to experience such a degree of closeness with someone he respected, admired and loved.

When he was fully inserted Roy began a slow thrust, allowing Ed to become accustomed to the feeling, then picked up momentum. Every thrust brought him deeper inside and he felt breathless from the shared sensations. He felt soft hands wrap around him as Ed clung tightly to him, his hands raking across the other's flesh as he was penetrated .

Astonished by this small display of affection, Roy thought about how small the other's hands felt around his back, fingers reaching out delicately to cover as much of the other as they could, sincearly wanting only to be close to Roy. Roy was initially startled and warmed by this seemingly minute display of tenderness, and couldn't help but smile affectionately down at Ed. After a moment however, his expression darknened, as though he had thought of something that wounded him and he changed, thrusting cruelly into the blonde, as though he wanted to hurt him and drive out the affection he felt.

Ed groaned softly, biting back a pained whimper, his arms momentarily tightening then falling from the older man's neck. Unable to move away from the sudden change in the man he looked up at him, and his eyes questioned the rage within the other. Seeing this, and realizing he must be hurting him the Colonel came back to himself and he locked eyes with the younger one, begging his forgiveness. Again, he became more loving and gentle. Entertwining his hand in one of his young lover's, he guided Ed's other hand down between his own legs. Placing Ed's hand on the hard organ with his own overtop, he stroked at his erection, showing Ed what he wanted him to do.

As soon as Ed began to pump at it, Roy released his hand to grasp his hips, angeling his thrusts so it gave him the most pleasure. Immediately the teen began to squirm gently, and his breathing quickened. He tossed his head back in rapture, bucking up and then thrusting back, uncertain of where he wanted to go in the moment. Caught in a frenzy of pleasure he moaned, the sensations building and building to the point where Ed thought he couldn't take it anymore. Wild from the intensity of it all, Ed cried out, and felt his body contract and finally came, filling his hand with stickiness.

Ed's mucles contracted around Mustang, enveloping him within its delicious heat. Continuing, he rode out Ed's orgasm until he came to his own, swearing softly in appreciation. With a few more thrusts he let loose moaning Ed's name and shooting his own seed deep within his lover. Collapsing on top of Ed he allowed himself a moment to savor the euphoric feelings. Withdrawing from the recesses of the younger one's body Roy glanced down at the teen. Ed also wore a look of satisfaction, and also of a serenity. Though he seemed tired he smiled at Roy and reached up to brush a few hair's from the other's face, with a gentleness that stole the other's breath. "I love you…" Ed murmured quietly, and gazed at him adoringly.

Roy winced as those words passed the teen's lips and sat away from Ed. Turning his face so he wasn't under the other's gaze any longer he allowed himself a pause to collect himself. He felt two different bitternesses. One of which was that he hadn't found this sooner…And the second was the bitterness that he was doing something wrong. He was resigned to the fact that he was supposed to be a murderer and for that, he felt he didn't deserve the warmth and innocence so freely given to him. He knew he had let himself get carried away. 'It was never supposed to go this far…' he thought to himself. Turning back to the teen he forced a smile. He would just enjoy this rare moment of freedom, without any strings attached. At least that way he would always have fond memories. It was refreshing to have a purpose in his life, other than the one's laid out for him. It was intoxicating, and he wanted Ed to be part of that. He was afraid though, that the near future might have some unpleasant surprises for the teen, and that he might end up hurting him.

Kissing the boy fondly on the forehead, he gave the boy's hand a squeeze. "I love ya too…" he said uncertainly, and smiled again. Then he got up and retreated alone to the bathroom, leaving Ed sitting alone on the floor, wondering what he had done wrong.


	8. Happily Never After

**Chapter 8: Happily Never After**

Author's note: _So here it is finally…The final chapter. I want to thank you all for your patience. I just got my cord back on Friday last week and have been scrambling to catch up with EVERYTHING on my plate. Because of your patience I was able to make this the longest chapter yet . And also please take note of this…Please don't hate me for the ending n.n; I will accept any criticisms and such forth for it but know there IS more to the story if anyone wants it. This is where you have to pay attention: IF you want more of this story please review and say so! Cause if there's no demand for it, I won't post it n.n; I'm lazy that way. Thank you all for your continued support and without further ado…The final chapter_

Alphonse was worried. He was also bored. Ed had been gone longer than he'd ever been before and it was disheartening to the younger that he'd been left behind. When Ed hadn't returned as planned Al had gone to headquarters and got the whole story. He was concerned his brother had been headstrong, and was about to take off after him but was stopped. So instead, he waited impatiently, and every day trekked from his shared apartment, to headquarters and then to the library. This day was no different; he was taking the familiar route thinking about how much he missed having his brother to talk to. He was so lost in his thoughts that when he first heard his brother's voice, he thought he was imagining it. However there was no mistaking that the voice he heard yelling was his brother, and he sounded pissed. Alphonse listened more carefully and was able to make out what his brother was shouting: "Bastard!! Open up this door right now and tell me what's going on!!" Following the sound of bangs Al was led to Colonel Mustang's house. Taking the stairs two at a time he ran to investigate.

He found Ed in front of the second floor bathroom, banging his right fist against the door. This wasn't too out of place, because Ed got mad at the drop of a hat. What was strange was Edward wasn't wearing any clothing. "BROTHER!!" Alphonse squealed, tossing the nearest material at his brother, a sheet that had been folded on a chair in front of a bedroom. "It's no wonder he's locked himself in there, with you parading around naked and all!! What's going on?" Embarrassed he quickly turned away from his nude brother, and for once was glad of the armor he was trapped in, had he a real body he was sure right now he'd be bright red. No matter what he thought of, he couldn't think of a good reason his brother was naked in the Colonel's house, pounding down his bathroom door.

Edward did blush and gathered the thin white material around his small frame. 'Shit shit…What is Al doing here??' he thought to himself, and believed Al must either be psychic or have the worst timing in the history of mankind. He stammered for a moment, trying to think of an adequate reason for all this without telling Al straight out what he'd been up to. When he couldn't come up with anything he pushed past his brother, running downstairs for his clothing. Alphonse followed shortly after, waiting for Ed to hurriedly pull on his pants and a tank top. "So, are you going to explain??" he asked, folding his arms over his chest. Edward sighed and shook his head.

"Never mind, you don't want the details." He said dismissively, dressing at lightning speed. "Listen, Roy is acting weird. You have to help me get him out of the bathroom. He's locked himself in." Ed hoped this was enough to get his brother to help. Usually Alphonse was more than happy to help with his hot headed, reckless plans. How was he supposed to explain to his younger, more innocent brother that he was intimately involved with the person he routinely called a bastard?

Al stared blankly at Ed, confused at his pigheadedness. "Ed, I can't just help without knowing anything. What if there's a good reason he's locked in there? What if he's sick?" Ed shook his head. "Maybe he just wants some time alone then Ed, this is his house…You should just come home with me and let him rest." Edward shook his head again furiously, annoyed by the suggestion.

"Well if you won't take my suggestions then maybe you should go back up there and talk to him." He said and sighed. "I don't understand what's going on but it's between you and him. You made the mess, you work it out." He said gently, pushing Edward towards the stairs. Ed didn't resist but stared back at Al with an uncertain expression. Alphonse chuckled, Edward though older than his years could look so childlike sometimes. He waved him towards the stairs again. "I'll wait down here." He said patiently.

Ed trudged back upstairs, thoughts heavy. He didn't share his brother's confidence that he'd be able to set things right. For one, he had no clue what he'd done wrong. One minute they'd been close, intimate and Edward had really felt a connection between them. The next, well...It had felt as though suddenly the wall had given away, sending him sprawling onto the ground. He played back the scene on the way up the stairs, half preoccupied by counting each stair as he stepped on it. He remembered the look in the Colonel's eyes before he'd retreated...something between anger and pain. By the tenth stair it suddenly made sense…It wasn't anything he did, it was what he had said. His stomach lurched; those words had seemed so natural, so right…So why did they bother Roy? Could he not feel the same? The stairs suddenly ended and Edward found himself again staring at the door. 'I wonder if he regrets what happened….." he thought to himself as he gently rapped on the door.

"Roy...Please, I'm tired of pounding on the door. I want to talk..." He said desperately. His sentence cutting off sharply as he pitched foreword into the room as the door was yanked open. Looking up from where he'd so ungracefully landed he was greeted by a solemn Roy, who offered a hand out to Ed apologetically.

Ed accepted the help and was pulled to his feet by strong hands. As soon as Roy knew he was steady he closed the door behind him. The teen stood silently, the air around him almost crackling with nervous energy. Unsure of how to breech the subject of the doubts he had, he waited for Roy to make the first move, frightened that if he were to break the silence somehow whatever had triggered the others earlier coldness may return. On Roy's part, he silently stared, a serious expression in his eyes. Gesturing, he offered Ed a seat.

"I'm sorry…" He said softly. "I over-reacted. I convinced myself that I was doing you wrong, or that I was somehow forcing you into everything." He looked away; as though there was more he couldn't bear to speak.

Ed shrugged, pulling together words that might make everything right again. "I was just as guilty then. I didn't say no...Didn't push you away. So you didn't force me. I said yes of my own free will." He hugged the other gently. "You can't take all the blame, if there is any sin to it, it's shared. Though I don't think there's anything wrong with it. It certainly didn't feel wrong..." He said with a small blush. Roy smiled and wrapped his arms around the smaller man, hands trailing slowly over him. Tilting Ed's head upwards he kissed him passionately, reaching behind him to turn the faucet on the bathtub, filling the basin with water.

"What would you say to a relaxing bath, hmmmm?" He asked, smirking. He reached into the stream of water then flicked a small amount of the warm water onto the other's face. Ed flinched, getting a hand up just is time to keep the water from its destination.

Laughing Ed shook his head. "No, as awesome as that sounds, my brother is waiting downstairs and I haven't seen him in forever! I should go talk to him for awhile, catch up...you know." He shrugged, eyes wandering towards the door, thoughts already straying to what he and his brother would talk about. Roy pouted dramatically, gesturing again to the rapidly filling tub. When Ed again shook his head and headed towards the door Roy's pout turned to a snarl and with a growl deep in his throat he caught the younger around the waist, spun him off his feet and dropped him, fully clothed, into the steaming water. He smirked victoriously as the younger pulled himself up from under the water gasping and spluttering, his clothing sticking wetly to his frame, trapping him. Blinded by bangs that clung to his face he tried desperately to find the edge of the tub. Mustang chuckled lowly and got into the bath after his young lover, wiping away the wet hair from the other's eyes.

"When are you going to learn to recognize a command, Fullmetal?" He said coyly, still chuckling and kissed him roughly before he could reply.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Downstairs Alphonse waited with baited breath. Every so often his gaze wandered upstairs. He was glad there was no yelling, a sign that things were remaining civil. This was good, because Ed was particularly volatile when it came to the Colonel, something he'd wondered about often in the years the two had known each other. Something about the Colonel always seemed to push his headstrong brother the wrong way, causing the sparks to fly whenever they were together. He heard soft murmurs of the two chatting upstairs and unconsciously strained to hear what they were saying, snapping back guiltily for doing so. Al had to remind himself that it was consciously that he had excluded himself from his brother, and therefore could wait to find out what was happening. Try as he might his curiosity got the better of him. He thought he had heard the word 'sorry' and a few minutes later was happy to hear the two laughing.

With a sound that could only be labelled as a sigh of relief Al headed to the door. Al sensed that this was one moment in his brother's life he couldn't in good faith intrude on. He was just happy that his brother was getting along with the other man. The Colonel was always helping them, going out of his way to find out things that would help them. Al saw him as something of a father, and truthfully it was probably the closest thing he'd experienced. Unlike Ed, Al remembered nothing of the man who they called dad. Giggling happily to himself he thought it was great that Ed was beginning to respect the Colonel the same way he himself always had.

The walk back to the apartment went by as quickly as ever. Al was greeted by silence, but this didn't bother him the way it had the whole time Ed had been away. He sat at the small study and pulled out the notes his brother had left behind before he went to Xing. He had made little progress, his brother's form of shorthand proving difficult to crack.

He had been at work a few hours when the phone suddenly pulled him from the garbled equations and difficult theories he was deciphering. A quick glance outside told him it was early evening. The streetlights were flickering softly already, somewhere between his studies the man had come and lit the oil lamps. He watched the thin flame following it upward looking at the sky. It was a deep blue and the sun was slipping low, painting the horizon crimson. Somehow tonight the red bathed sky made Alphonse nervous, like it was a promise of something sinister to come. Quickly he picked up the phone and put it to his ear.

"Hello, Alphonse?" said a crisp, female voice on the other end that he recognized as First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye. "I was wondering if your brother was around…" There was barely camouflaged worry in her voice which instantly put Al on edge.

"No…." Al began tentatively. "But I know where he is and could pass on a message." He prodded gently, his curiosity taking hold. Hawkeye usually didn't usually call for Edward directly and certainly not when he was off duty. Not to mention the late hour..Most everyone at Headquarters was on their way home.

"Yes, you could tell him that he should come to the military hospital as soon as possible. We have Colonel Mustang here with us, he was found early this morning. Tell him not to worry, besides some dehydration and bruises he's fine." Riza continued though Alphonse seized listening. Panic and confusion was running through him. Mustang was in the hospital…Since this morning? That made no sense, not when Edward had clearly said he'd been with him all day. So what was going on? Did he get hurt after...No that didn't make sense if they'd found him in the morning? Nor was Edward talking to himself, and he'd never be at the Colonel's house if he didn't think he was there as well. He realized he had let the receiver drop from his ear and numbly replaced it, trying to focus on what the Lieutenant was saying.

"..en we brought him in he was beside himself, very distraught. He babbled a long time before the nurse finally had to give him a sedative. He kept saying the very same thing over and over again…" She paused, and Alphonse wished she would hurry up and spit it out. "He said he wasn't the target of the attack and that he had to get to Fullmetal, that someone had to protect him. He said he wasn't safe alone. That's why I was so glad you said you've been in contact Alphonse."

"I----I have to go." Al said nervously, his mind running a mile a minute. It took him a moment to catch up but suddenly it all clicked together. If Mustang was in the hospital with Hawkeye and the others, that only left one person who could be with his brother. Terror swept through his body as he realized the peril his brother could be in. "Hold on Ed…" he muttered to himself as the receiver clattered to the ground, the younger Elric out the door before he could hear the crash.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The dark haired man stared down at the now sleeping blonde thoughtfully. He watched the slow rise and fall of the boy's chest and mused on the unfairness of life. In mere seconds a life could be erased, destroyed or changed. Lonely he wrapped an arm possessively around the boy, pulling the fair-haired youth over with ease so that he was draped over his chest. Though never waking up, Edward nuzzled into the other, wrapping his arms tenderly around the elder's neck. Smiling gently at the unconscious gesture he marvelled that this small, beautiful creature fit into his arms perfectly and for now was all his…No one to share with or lose him to. Darkness crept into his eyes, as reality reared its ugly head. It would be perfect….If he was actually the one the boy loved.

His orders rang clearly in his head. He's become a nuisance…They'd said. Eliminate the older Elric, they'd ordered. At the time this would have been an easy mission, he'd hated the little fucker. Yet, he always had to up the stakes, make a game out of the hunt. This time, it had backfired and he'd let everything go too far. He'd developed _feelings _for the one condemned…and that made it all the more difficult. He hated that now it was more than a simple lynching but a betrayal so deep that it could destroy them both before the alchemist took his final breath. The closeness he felt was such a cruelty...Especially to Ed, something he regretted deeply. It had all started as a curiosity, just a spark of impishness that had formulated this most fiendish of plans. It started a few weeks before Ed had left on the mission he was never supposed to return from. He'd taken to following Ed around, noting routines, habits and weaknesses. What he'd noticed is that the boy had definitely seemed less tightly-wound with the Colonel around, and small kindnesses that Ed would bestow on the man when he thought he wasn't looking. He never meant to explore this, to find out anything more…But the desire was there. He never meant to make the boy love him….Or worse to return the feeling. He wished he could just walk away now and save the boy some pain…but of course that was out of the question. Dolefully, he ran over the past few months with Edward. Truthfully he couldn't think of a better time in his life. He sighed heavily when he remembered that every action, smile and kiss had actually been for another. Though this whole thing was one sided and false, and the feelings he felt would be purely one sided, he couldn't help but love him.

"Well…All good things must come to an end..." He said softly, resigned to the fate of the boy softly stirring beside him. Steeling him towards the violence of this whole matter he closed off his mind to the horror rushing around it. Hearing the other speak Ed opened up his eyes, sleepily rubbing his eyes. Looking over at Roy, confusion in his eyes at being woken up, trying to figure out what was going on. He pulled Ed closer, so that he was underneath him and kissed him passionately, relishing these final moments. When he let him up for air he regarded him sadly.

"Then…This is goodbye…" he whispered to the blonde, crushing him against his chest, breathing deeply…Committing his scent to memory. Ed stiffened against him, not understand what was going on. He tried to pull away to look at Roy's face but the other held him tighter, restricting his movement.

"Are you worried about before Roy? You're not forcing me into anything, you know that right?" He said desperately, trying to understand why he's all of a sudden was so cold towards him, and wouldn't look him in the eye. Roy slowly shook his head, willing his expression to become impassive. Ed clung to him helplessly, wanting for the clock to turn back and bring back the Roy he had come to love. "If you were just messing around, if you weren't serious about this…_then why did you start this_!!?" He said trying not to cry. "What was this?? Some sort of sick joke, just another conquest? Don't my feelings count?? I LOVE you damnit! You made me love you….If you'd never followed me to Xing none of this would have happened." He tried to kiss him, to bring back the spark they'd shared not even a day ago, but Roy pushed him back.

"You misunderstood Hagane, I said its goodbye...Not that I was leaving you. What I'm saying is this is a lie." He said dropping his disguise. "So you see chibi-chan...Maybe you shouldn't have fallen in love. Don't worry though, you won't suffer long...I intend to take very good care of you." He watched with some satisfaction as his expression changed, becoming shocked, then angry and finally heartbroken. Feeling a bit bad he gave a small smile promising himself he'd make it quick. "That's right chibi; your precious Colonel was never here. It was all me…You fell in love with me!" Long slender fingers closed around his neck and then began to squeeze. Ed made no move to stop him, shocked into submission by the betrayal. Tears he'd held back until now began to run down his cheeks, falling onto the pillow.

Envy closed his eyes, trying to block out the other's pain. He continued to strangle the young alchemist with shaking hands. 'I don't want this...It's not my fault…Quit looking at me like that....' he thought in anguish. Images rushed through him, feelings and moments in the last few months tortured him. He saw Ed that first night...So sweet, innocent and cautious. Felt his small body against his, heavy in sleep, peacefully resting within his arms, the molten eyes that had greeted him that morning, still soft with sleep. Surprise in his features that everything had been real and not a dream. That's when he'd first started to care…His hands dug sharply into flawless skin, drawing blood. He heard his laugh, felt his warmth...The passion with which he loved and was engulfed by all that was Ed.

Ed…..The hot headed brat who never did things half way. With him it was all or nothing. He didn't ever leave anyone to suffer. Quick to anger…But also quick to forgive. He was kind, good and brave. He loved…Loved his brother enough to sacrifice his own innocence by becoming a dog, loved people enough to try to save them from their own foolishness, loved the Colonel both as a comrade in arms, a friend and most recently had tasted what true love could feel like….

Ed….Rough around the edges. Full of spunk and fire and ice. Scathing in his insults and passionate in his pursuit. He remembered the feel of him, how once he got past his embarrassment there was a furious fire lit. That _he _had been the cause of that fire, that he could give him that much pleasure. Then after the physical there was that innate tenderness within the teen that would leave the other breathless. What could the boy have done to deserve this…What had he himself done to deserve this loathsome task. He squeezed his eyes tight, and tried to forget about the lump that had mysteriously appeared in his throat. He heard a sound then and his eyes opened, startled as he realized they were coming from him…That he was sobbing, his own tears mixing with Ed's. He gave a cry of pure anguish.

"God damnit!!" He screamed at the boy lying prone against the mattress. "Why….Why??! Why love him. Why did you have to love _him _Edward??! This could have been so much easier…On the both of us." He choked out, watching as the other's startling eyes began to darken. Coming alive suddenly Edward attempted to claw at the hands around his neck, frantically trying to get the air his body needed to stay alive. His movements however were weak and futile, barely even affecting the Homunculus. As the seconds passed his movements became weaker and more sluggish, his body shutting down, dying.

Suddenly one memory made the sin stop cold. Ed brushing a hand against his face, with a smile so gentle and serene it seemed out of place on the boy, and a whispered confession that even then had been so bittersweet. Those three little words, full of implication and most of all sincerity. In that one moment, he did love the one in front of him….Regardless of what would happen. That moment, was everything…Was the truth. Ed unknowingly had given him the greatest gift he'd ever received….Love freely given. He froze, and the grip he had around the other loosed. Ed drew in a long shuddering breath, coughing painfully.

"I can't do it…._I can't fucking kill you!!_" Envy raged, dropping his hands altogether from the boy's neck. He studied the vicious red marks he'd left on the other's skin and got up, towering over the still gasping boy.

"I'm leaving….Consider it a gift from me." He said angrily. "But, before I do, let me tell you something. This…Is as close as you'll get." He said cruelly. "Remember that, the Colonel you love, the one you wanted so desperately that even I noticed….He only likes woman. You'll never have this with him. He loves you yes…But as a son." He smirked as the other flinched. "This is the closest you'll ever get to the real thing, so I hope you enjoyed it." His mirthless cackle echoed around the room even long after he'd jumped out the window, leaving Ed alone.

Edward climbed weakly out of the bed. He made it as far as the window before his strength ran out and collapsed to the floor. A hand went up and grazed against his neck, shocked to find they were still painful and beginning to bruise. His face crumpled and he doubled over upon himself, his body wracked with silent sobs as everything finally hit home.

"He wasn't here…He wasn't here…" He murmured to himself, trying to block out the heartbreak he felt at being abandoned after being used so. He continued to cry, curling up into a ball, trying to keep himself from tearing in half with the hot stabbing pain in his heart…Everything else was minor.

It was in this position his brother found him. Al looked into the dark room and noticed his brother sitting still against the wall, his head bent forward. Fearing the worst he ran forward but Ed looked up at him as he approached. Al gasped, Ed wasn't dead but his eyes were impassive and without their usual spark. It was like just after their attempt at human transmutation…A time Ed had wished he were dead. Al noisily dropped down beside his brother.

"Brother...Where's Roy?" He asked worriedly, taking in the wounds on his brother's neck. His brother looked momentarily confused, shoulders sagging in despair.

"Roy??..." he whispered painfully and self consciously pulled up the collar of his shirt. He clutched at his chest in pain and hid his face, trying not to break into tears in front of his brother. "He was never here…" he answered bitterly.

Al nodded and hugged him as carefully as he could before helping him up. It was times like this the younger brother wished he could take away all the pain his brother dealt with. "I know…" he started gently. "But I know where he is..." Pulling his brother by the hand he headed towards the hospital. 'Quickly…' he thought to himself. 'Help me to heal him once more…."

~Owari~


	9. First part of sequel up

Okay I have the prologue up for the sequel. Thank you everyone who reviewed….You spur this along n.n;

.net/s/5409245/1/Votre_Verite


End file.
